And So This Is Christmas

 A couple of weeks ago, I went to the Western New Mexico University Women’s basketball game with friends. As with every local college sporting event, the Vietnam War Vet’s color guard marched out, carrying U.S., New Mexico and military branch flags, solemn and silent and center court during the playing of the national anthem. I am not into the military. I question the real reason behind war. But these vets practically move me to tears every time I see them. They are a good representation of New Mexico soldiers – white guys, Native Americans, the original and true warriors of our nation, and Mexican Americans, who by sheer dumb luck were on the north side of a line arbitrarily drawn by the politicos divvying up land a long time ago. Short haired, long silver ponytailed hair, patches, badges, berets, boots.

One of my new buddies is Leonard, and at 93 ½ years old, is sharp and funny and generous with his single malt whisky. He was at the game too, wheeling his walker over to the corner of the gymnasium and getting a low seat on the bleachers. Leonard is a proud World War II veteran. Jewish; originally from Chicago.  The Viet Nam vets often stop and shake Leonard’s hand and chat after the ceremony as the game gets underway. And at this particular game two weeks ago, as they were leaving, Leonard hollers at them, “See you at the cemetery!” A few of us laughed in surprise. Was Leonard planning an earthly exit and we didn’t know about it? But one of our friends enlightened us. During the upcoming weekend, there was going to be a ceremony at the Fort Bayard Cemetery – the placing of Christmas wreaths at the markers of the soldiers buried there. Leonard was planning to attend. Jewish or not, he was still a soldier and would honor the men and women that went before him.

It doesn’t matter what day it is, or what the weather is like. My dog needs to run. Every morning. Christmas is no exception. So after a gloriously sunny hike on Boston Hill, I decided to drive the ten minutes to the cemetery. It sits on the west side of the old abandoned fort. It is lovingly cared for. I wanted to see the wreaths. And they were there, row upon row. 

Another was at the base of the Buffalo Soldier memorial. 

And in the silence, John Lennon’s/Yoko Ono’s Christmas song popped into my head. When I got home I looked up the lyrics. I had completely forgotten the song title, which is “Happy Xmas (War is Over).” I’m probably breaking some copyright law, but I decided to include the lyrics in this post. Peace to you my friends and family. Happy Holidays.

Happy Xmas (War is Over)

So this is Xmas
And what have you done
Another year over
And a new one just begun
And so this is Xmas
I hope you have fun
The near and the dear one
The old and the young

A very Merry Xmas
And a happy New Year
Let's hope it's a good one
Without any fear

And so this is Xmas (war is over)
For weak and for strong (if you want it)
For rich and the poor ones (war is over)
The road is so long (if you want it)
And so happy Xmas (war is over)
For black and for white (if you want it)
For yellow and red ones (war is over)
Let's stop all the fight (now)

A very Merry Xmas
And a happy New Year
Let's hope it's a good one
Without any fear

And so this is Xmas (war is over)
And what have we done (if you want it)
Another year over (war is over)
A new one just begun (if you want it)
And so happy Xmas (war is over)
We hope you have fun (if you want it)
The near and the dear one (war is over)
The old and the young (now)

A very Merry Xmas
And a happy New Year
Let's hope it's a good one
Without any fear

War is over, if you want it
War is over now

Happy Xmas

Happy Solstice from Snowy Silver City

Snow in the high desert is a beautiful thing and often short-lived. We took a hike this morning (William, Elizabeth and me, and of course our dogs Daizy and Seamus). This is what the Dragonfly Trail looks like. And I think I’m going to have to invest in a camera as I take all my pics with my cell phone and it doesn’t do the beauty of the place enough justice.

The Art of Doing Nothing/The Luxury of Time

A few months ago, my former Aunt-in-Law, Ann, and her daughter Jackie came to visit me for a day. They live in Tucson, about 3 hours away. They are very lovely people and I’ve known them since my early twenties. In fact, I sold my motorcycle to Jackie when she was just 21 and I was 30. I don’t think Aunt Ann was too happy about it, but that’s another story. Jackie is now in her late 40’s and a busy mom of three beautiful kids. Busy.

During a leisurely lunch at Tre Rosat, Jackie asked me somewhat hesitantly what I did all day. I smiled broadly and said ‘not much.’ I don’t think she could imagine what that looked like. When I was her age, I couldn’t imagine it either. I was that career woman/mother/wife –ex-wife/single mom/volunteer/athlete/fixer/adrenaline junkie that many women of my age became because we were living up to, and killing ourselves over, an impossible fantasy of ourselves. Jackie is in that world.

There is really nothing wrong with much of that life. We get a lot done. We help a lot of people. We often financially secure our future. But when there is no governor to it all, the busy-ness consumes our souls. It cores us. We lose perspective.

As a new mom 25 years ago, my beloved former step-mother-in-law, Anne (a popular name in my world…), gave me a calendar titled  “For Women Who Do Too Much” and I didn’t know how to take it. I think she was trying to tell me to slow down a bit. Instead, I felt affronted because maybe she thought I just wasn’t handling my oh so busy and important life as well as I could…. Ha ha. Well it only took me 32 more years to get the message.

I started slowing down when I left San Diego for Portland. I called my Portland experience my “Eight-Year Southern California/Corporate World De-Tox Phase.”

I haven’t labeled my Silver City experience anything yet. It’s too early. And besides, I’m busy doing nothing.

Well, that’s not quite true. I walk a lot. Young dogs inspire that. I observe a lot, take a lot of pictures. I am experimenting with a response of doing nothing instead of doing something when things aren’t going the way I want them to. And that, I tell you, is a real challenge for someone like me.

I want to ask my friends out there, especially my women friends of a certain age still running rough shod over their own lives, and being so damn busy – what are you trying to prove? Do you have enough Money? Friends? Lovers? Success?  Possessions?  Self-worth? Can you please take a moment and take stock, and maybe do nothing for once? Just start practicing the Art of Doing Nothing. Enjoy the Luxury of Time. But be careful. It can become habit forming…

What I see when I am doing nothing:

Sunset

Morning Snow

Boston Hill Morning in the Mist

Boston Hill Snow and Sun

Boston Hill Morning Clouds

Dogs

 I like my cat. She’s a good cat and has stuck to me like a friendly burr for nearly ten years. She’s been to the vet only twice, once to be spayed and once for a rabies vaccination when we moved. She doesn’t fight with other cats; or at least, she comes away unscathed. She is a merciless and efficient hunter of vermin. A good cat.

BUT – I love my dog. Even though he threw up in my car the first few times we went on a drive. Even when he chewed up one of my $100 pair of Chaco sandals. Even though he doesn’t understand the concept of Daylight Savings Time or sleeping in. Even though he considers horse droppings a tasty treat on the hiking trails. I love my dog.

I remember the exact moment I finally got it about dogs and their human soul mates. I was with Indy, my ancient Hurricane Katrina rescue mutt, at one of his more frequent vet visits. Dr Bob Bruno, Westmoreland Vet Clinic, a humorous and commonsense man. I don’t know what we were contemplating about Indy’s care. But in a flash, at that moment, I became more than this animal’s caretaker. I pulled him in close to me and said I love this dog and I will do whatever it takes to make sure he has the best life possible.

I have occasionally made other such instinctive statements. For example, when attending a career change workshop in Portland a few years ago, I said aloud in a class full of hopeful changees, I would rather be homeless than ever work in the corporate world again.  Or when I told my daughter there are some people I would kill for but you are the only one I’d die for.

There are many out there that need a pet to lavish attention on, to adore and spoil. It gives them an outlet to be vulnerable enough to love and minimizes the devastation of rejection. This is a wonderful thing, both for the pet and the human. It reminds us that we still have a soul and the capacity to love.

But I’ve come to believe, truly and earnestly, that there is something special about dogs. It only took me 50 years to figure that out. I’m lucky I got the chance. And I’m lucky I got the dog. And he got me.

Seamus on Boston Hill

Some of the special dogs I know:

Dutchmaster

Kiya R.I.P.

Queen Sandy

Sirius and Seamus

King Louie and Buddha

Cute and Cuter!

Pocket Pup

Daizy and Seamus

Ruh Roh! Scooby Doo

Wrecking Ball. Best Costume Ever!

The “Manhattan” of Silver City

On the road to the Cliff Dwellings

  Since I moved here in April, I’ve had a lovely gang of visitors. Lucky me! My most recent visitor was my brother. I drove the 200 miles to Tucson, (the most convenient big airport) and we drove back, arriving in SC as night settled. Meaning that it was pitch black the last 50 miles of the nowhere land between Lordsburg and Silver City. We unloaded the car, and walked across the street for a late dinner, then walked Seamus around the block as I explained the layout of the city. I live in the heart of the arts/historic/lively downtown. My brother turned to me at one point and said, “So you’re telling me you live in the Manhattan of Silver City.” Ha ha-only he could have nailed it down so succinctly.

The great thing about visitors, especially ones that you really like, is that you go places you haven’t been, or you go back to places and get a chance to see them anew. And that’s just what my brother and I did. Here are some pics: 

Cliff Dwellings

 The City of Rocks about 30 miles outside of Silver City is a really neat place to scramble around too. And just a note about the following picture: My brother was not trying to re-enact the Boy Scout Leaders' destruction of a 165 million year old rock formation in Utah's Goblin Valley State Park. He was just having some fun. And no, the rock didn't budge an inch.....

Stone Lioness and Cub - City of Rocks

 And of course, what would a visit be like without a little turtle search and rescue too? 

Hello Again

Well, after a brief hiatus with a few adventures, I'm back to writing again. At least, I'm back to posting pics - writing to follow.....
I took Seamus hiking on the Dragonfly Trail this weekend. I don't know if it can get any more beautiful.

Loving the world

“Anyone can slay a dragon he told me, but try waking up every morning and loving the world all over again…” Brian Andreas

Do you love your world? In all it’s imperfection and puzzles and frustrations? In your body that’s too fat or too thin or too old or too beat up? Do you take time to love your world? Some days it’s a lot easier than others. And I have to admit I lead an incredibly blessed and charmed life. At the moment I don’t have to work. I don’t have to grind through my days with boring meetings, or hard physical labor. Or deal with people I just don’t like.  And in spite of this, I still find things to grouse about. But not too much.

I haven’t had the desire to write the past couple of weeks. Of course, during that time I had a bad bad stomach virus that laid me flat for over a week. It’s called losing five pounds the hard way. Thank goodness for my tribe, my gang, my people, my friends here in Silver. They tended to me with great loving care.

Then my former father in law dropped into town for a quick visit. He tells me I’m his favorite former daughter in law, but there’s not much competition. He’s a complicated man, but I think he adores me in spite of myself.

I’m loading up a bunch of photos that I’ve taken the past several weeks. Because they remind me to love my world over and over again. And my wish for you, my readers, is to be happily surprised every day with something that makes you love again. 

Pears from neighbor Paula's tree

Pheenie trying to blend in...

Another example of bad camouflage....

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Best Camouflage

Chris's Petrograf

Chris's Petrograf 2

How it looks when it rains

And remember - before the rains...

Sunset after a rainstorm

On the Anniversary of My Father’s Death

A tribute to my dad from his basketball days at Fordham University (poster design by A. Aggari)

My dad died a year ago, August 2^nd at age 85. He carried a copy of this saying in his wallet for decades and, later in life, framed and hung it in his room as a reminder about what was really important. He did his best to live by these words, and I am grateful to him for so many, many things.

Success

To laugh often and much;

To win the respect of intelligent people

and the affection of children;

To earn the appreciation of honest critics

and endure the betrayal of false friends;

To appreciate beauty, to find the best in others;

To leave the world a bit better, whether by healthy child,

a garden patch or a redeemed social condition;

To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived.

This is to have succeeded.

Another Day in Paradise

There are a hundred things that happen every day that remind me what a rich life I lead. I took these pics in the past 24 hours. They serve as little touchstones. I don’t have pics of the phone calls to friends and family, the lovely Thai dinner my friend cooked for me, the other friends that brought popcorn and sat on the porch and then the side street as my neighbor began her Saturday night ‘ghost mural’ show – slides of art and life projected onto the big white stucco wall across from her art studio. I promised another friend (Henry the Fourth, that’s you!), I would put up two posts this weekend. I am getting in just under the wire….

Still working on the friendship dynamics...

Puppy Palooza with Daisy and Seamus

Dark clouds on Bullard

More dramatic clouds and light

Double rainbow at dusk from my street corner

Sunday morning hiking buddies on the Dragonfly Trail

Trail Blossom

Another Trail Blossom

Dragonfly Petroglyph

At the crest near the dragonfly petroglyph

Nature's Sculpture

End of the hike

Mountain View Road at noon looking northward